Health News : The signs caregiving is harming your health

Mandy Oaklander | September 15, 2026

Fall is arriving soon, which means apple-picking season is in full swing here in the Northeast. If you need a reason to pick some fruit—whether off a tree or at the grocery store—consider this alarming statistic tucked into a new federal report my colleague Alice Park wrote about today: when researchers asked U.S. adults what they ate on a given day, 30% said they hadn’t had any fruit.

That means at least a third of us need more of the sweet stuff in our lives, which—to me, at least—is some of the most delicious health advice to follow.

TODAY’S TOPICS

The health costs of caregiving
A cancer-drug mismatch
100,000+ people in Japan are over 100

PLEASE ADVISE

Here’s a great question we received from a reader:

How can I tell whether caregiving is merely exhausting me or actually damaging my health? What warning signs suggest I need to make a change or seek help?

Malte Mueller—Getty Images

I suspect a lot of caregivers have asked themselves some version of this question—probably while canceling their own doctor’s appointment for the third time. Caring for someone you love can be draining even when everything is going relatively smoothly. So how do you know if you’re merely exhausted, or if your own health is starting to pay the price?

The best clue isn’t whether you’re wiped out after a particularly brutal week. It’s whether changes to your health and habits have become “consistent or persistent,” says Diane Mariani, a licensed clinical social worker and director of Caring for Caregivers at Rush University Medical Center.

Pay attention if you’re regularly sleeping or eating differently, feeling unusually irritable, skipping the walks or other exercise you once enjoyed, or withdrawing from people because you don’t have the bandwidth to talk. Another big warning sign: Your own health keeps sliding to the bottom of the list. Maybe you’re brushing off symptoms you’d normally get checked out, postponing a mammogram or colonoscopy, or letting a chronic condition go unmanaged.

Mariani believes many caregivers sense when things have become unsustainable. “I think most caregivers do kind of know,” she says. “They just don’t know the solution.” One useful gut check is to ask yourself: “If nothing about this arrangement changes, can I keep living this way for another three or six months?” If your entire body answers “absolutely not,” listen to it.

What probably won’t help is scolding yourself about “self-care.” Mariani avoids that language because, to an overwhelmed caregiver, it can sound like one more task—or like they’re still not doing enough. Instead, start smaller: What’s one thing you wish you still had time for? Maybe it’s your morning walk, reading before bed, or drinking a cup of coffee while it’s still hot. Then identify the specific obstacle and ask someone to remove it: “I want to keep doing this, but I can’t sustain it exactly as it is. Could you handle the grocery shopping for the next few weeks?” Or: “Could you stay with Mom on Tuesday so I can make it to my appointment?”

If the changes to your sleep, mood, eating habits, or physical health are persisting—or you’re repeatedly postponing your own medical care—contact your primary-care doctor. You can also ask the health system treating your loved one whether it offers caregiver support, social-work services, or support groups. If researching resources feels like one responsibility too many, delegate that exact job to someone who keeps asking how they can help.

Needing the arrangement to change doesn’t mean you love the person you’re taking care of any less—or that you’re failing them. It means you want to keep caring for them without disappearing from your own life in the process. —Angela Haupt, Editor, Health & Wellness

Got a social dilemma of your own? Send it our way to healthmatters@time.com, and we might tackle it in a future edition.

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BIG NUMBER

30-35%

About one third of newer cancer drugs are available in an oral form, many of which are targeted to particular tumor biologies and are more convenient for patients. But insurance companies often cover them differently than infused or injected versions, which can lead to higher out-of-pocket costs, according to Ted Okon, executive director of the Community Oncology Alliance, a nonprofit group.

He was one of several speakers testifying today at a U.S. House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform hearing about drivers of unaffordability for oral chemotherapy. —Alana Semuels, Senior Correspondent

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Japan is home to more than 107,000 centenarians—a new record for the country—which cements Japan's population as one of the longest-lived in the world, according to Chris Lau and Junko Ogura at CNN.
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When patients in Minnesota became afraid to show up to doctor’s appointments earlier this year because they feared encounters with ICE, doctors at one clinic switched to home visits, Madison McVan writes for the Minnesota Reformer.

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