Mandy Oaklander | October 08, 2026

Sometimes, what feels good in the moment isn’t the healthiest choice. Venting. Procrastinating. The chocolate chip cookie I’m eating right now.

And canceling plans with your friends. It’s often tempting to stay in after a long day, but meeting a friend face to face is one of the best ways to nurture your social life—and, in turn, your health.

So don’t send that “sorry, but…” text just yet. Read on: my colleague Angela Haupt has advice about what to do instead of canceling your plans.

TODAY’S TOPICS

Stop doing boring stuff alone
Got a question for us?
Try a smaller get-together
Meet the 100-year-old bowler

QUICK CHAT

Do boring things together

There are few things I enjoy less than the administrative debris of adult life: paying bills, clearing out my inbox, making appointments, and tackling whatever else I’ve been pretending doesn’t exist. But while I was interviewing social-relationships researcher Katherine Fiori, she introduced me to a way to make it all considerably less miserable: Invite a friend over. —Angela Haupt, Editor, Health & Wellness

This interview has been condensed and edited for clarity.

Tatiana Maksimova—Getty Images

You told me people are having “admin nights” with their friends. What exactly are those?

You get together with a group of friends, sit with your laptops, and do all the administrative tasks you’ve been putting on the back burner. You might be paying bills, getting off email lists, or taking care of whatever else you have to do in your day-to-day life.

Why do you think that’s such a smart idea?

Normally, those tasks require time and energy that take away from your social relationships. So being able to combine the two is kind of brilliant. You’re getting something done that you needed to do anyway, but you're doing it alongside other people.

Does it really count as socializing if everyone’s staring at their own laptop?

Absolutely. Even if you’re doing something stupid like paying bills or getting off email lists, you have someone beside you. You’re joking and having conversations. You’re getting that social interaction instead of sitting there doing everything alone.

So we don’t always need to plan something exciting to get the benefits of being together?

No. The need for belonging is universal. The exact way people connect varies, but you can benefit from simply being with other people—even while you’re all doing tasks you would otherwise be doing alone.

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Ask the health team

Have a burning health or wellness question? Wondering how to handle a tricky social situation? Please write to healthmatters@time.com, and we’ll weigh in weekly in the newsletter.

Photo-Illustration by TIME (Source Images: Alina Kolyuka, Swan222, Heroik/Danial Project via Canva)

ONE SMALL CHANGE

Don’t cancel your plans. Shrink them

The sushi dinner you planned last week sounded delightful at the time. But tonight, putting on real pants and traveling across town feel like a preposterous proposition.

Before canceling, identify the draining part and make it smaller: Turn dinner into a 20-minute walk, order pizza in sweatpants, or say, “I really want to see you, but I’m running on fumes. Would you be up for takeout at my place?” —A.H.

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WHAT WE’RE READING

People are more likely to take health advice when they believe that their concerns and experience are being taken seriously, writes Dr. Megan L. Ranney for TIME.
“Medicare for All” might sound good, but how could it be implemented? Elisabeth Rosenthal for KFF looks into it.
At age 100, William Owen Hanna is still bowling strikes. Matteo Iadonisi at 6abc Philadelphia introduces the Pennsylvania centenarian who has no plans to retire his bowling shoes.

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